Kindness and Boundaries
Part of Mosaic Lifespan Curriculum
Open
“We light this chalice to celebrate Unitarian Universalism
(Make U U shapes with fingers)
This is the church of the open mind.
(Touch hands to head)
This is the church of the loving heart.
(Touch hands to heart)
This is the church of the helping hands!
(spread open hands, palms up)
Together we care for our earth and work for friendship and peace in our world!”
Light the chalice and invite students to check in with one word.
Read
“That’s Not My Name!” by Anoosha Syed (YouTube, 5:19) (read by author)
Watch
“Boundaries Song” (YouTube, 0:15)
Watch the video several times and practice singing it together.
Explore—can you all come up with another verse for the song together?
Do
Boundaries Matching Game
What happens when someone crosses your boundaries, or you see someone crossing someone else’s? How do you respond?
Write a list of possible scenarios on the left side of a whiteboard or large pad*. Then write possible responses on the right side of the board. You might ask for volunteers to read each list. Note for the class that some responses might be used more than once and (and that “tell a trusted adult” can be used along with many scenarios). Ask student volunteers as a group to find responses to each scenarios. You may want to also request help from someone who didn’t verbally answer to draw the line from one to another to engage less talkative students:
LEFT SIDE OF THE BOARD
- touching my hair without asking
- making jokes about my clothing
- talking about things that make me scared
- Asking if I need help
- holding my hand without asking
- Asking how my day was
- telling jokes that make me feel embarrassed
- touching private areas of my body
- showing me videos or pictures that make me uncomfortable
- Offering a high five or fist bump
- making jokes about how my food looks or smells
- trying on my clothing or shoes without asking
- Asking what my favorite animal is
RIGHT SIDE OF THE BOARD
- No
- Please don’t
- I don’t like that
- That makes me uncomfortable
- That hurt. Please don’t say that
- Not right now
- After I’m done
- Okay!
- Yes!
- Tell a trusted adult
*This can be adapted for online groups using the whiteboard function in Zoom
Close
“We gather the warmth of love, [bring hands over heart]
The light of truth, [bring hands over heart again]
And the energy of action [bring hands over heart again]
Into our hearts as we extinguish the chalice, [blow out the "flame"]
And go back into the world of doing and saying.
We carry this light forward into the dawning and the setting day.”
Extinguish the chalice and invite students to “check out” with one word or phrase.
Take Home
Read Aloud: “Milo's Boundaries” (YouTube, 6:00) by Rhea Dufresne
“That’s Not My Name!” (YouTube, 5:19) by Anoosha Syed (read by author)
Consider including a note for parents: The read aloud storybook video from class can be watched and discussed as follow up at home. Parents can watch and then talk with their kids about what it might be like to accidentally cross someone else's boundaries and how even though “intent” might not be bad, “impact” might still be harmful. So, it’s not enough to say “I didn’t mean it, but also, “I’m sorry I hurt you.” The inverse is that one can expect their feelings to be heard and respected by friends and loved ones, even if the other person didn’t intend any harm.