Having two facilitators for each group has many advantages. Sharing the responsibilities lightens the burden. It's helpful to have a partner to pay attention to group dynamics. If there are challenges, thinking through options with a thought partner is less stressful.

Small group ministry facilitators serves as the organizers, coordinators, guides, behavior models, and facilitators for each group. Facilitators are also participate in the program as a part of their group, which usually works well.

But sometimes this dual status can be a little odd — there may be times when the group’s need for facilitation takes precedence.

Here is an overview of role expectations for Small Group Ministry facilitators:

Organizer

• You will receive a list of names and contact information and an assigned day.
• With your co-facilitator, pick a date to meet and discuss how you will organize your first session
• Call each of the members of your group, introduce yourself, be enthusiastic and friendly, and give them the meeting date, time and room assignment. If you have to leave a message, ask them to RSVP to you.
• If anyone isn’t going to be able to regularly make meetings on this date and time, let the SGM Leadership Team know ASAP so we can get them into another group.

Coordinator and Leader

This will take some ongoing effort…but, share it between you and your co-facilitator and it won’t seem like much. These small tasks keep a group running smoothly and prevent all sorts of problems.

• When new members are added or drop out, keep your contact list updated and share this with the group when there are changes. The Leadership Team can help you with this.
• Send an email reminder or make a phone call a day or two before each meeting. This is enormously helpful in keeping attendance up.
• If the group needs to rearrange one of the dates, clearly communicate this to whole and send reminders.
• If someone misses a meeting, give that person a call to check in. Probably they just forgot, but let them know her presence was missed. Later in the season, you might agree to have several members share this responsibility with you.
• If someone new is added to your group, arrange to meet with them after church or go out for coffee. This will give you a chance to explain SGM and share the group covenant with that person. This gives them a sense of what they’re getting into, lets them know they’re part of the group, and generally prevents problems. At their first meeting, make sure that there is time for introductions.
• Drop outs. We’ll talk more about this in a future meeting, but here’s a brief overview: if possible, ask them to come to one more meeting so that the group can say “good bye”. Prior to that meeting, be sure to have a phone conversation with them about why they’re leaving. Be clear that you’re willing to hear negative feedback about the group or your own style, because that’s important to helping you grow as a facilitator and helps SGM become a stronger program. Relay any information you get to the Leadership Team. And keep the Leadership Team informed of drop outs so we know how large your group is.

Hosting: Sessions are usually scheduled at the church. However, if your group wants to meet at someone’s house and that is: accessible to anyone with a disability, a location that isn’t too far for anyone, doesn’t have pets that anyone is allergic to, and the host can guarantee privacy—then, go for it. These hints may be useful.

As a facilitator, you should communicate with the host so that he knows what you’re hoping for. Remember, though, perfection isn’t worth the effort.

• The host site should be accessible to all members of the group. If there are people in your group who have pet allergies, can’t travel from the car to the building, or can’t do stairs, do not try to make adaptations of the site.
• The first host may be excited to host all of the meetings, or this may be too much for him. At the first meeting your group can discuss their options, which include rotating between available houses!
• Ideally, an SGM meeting in a home happens in a living room with soft lamplight. There should be enough chairs for everyone, plus one extra to symbolize the space in the circle for those who might join. Ask your host to set up an inviting space. Hopefully there’s a small table for the chalice.
• Food can distract from the group, but if the host wishes, tea or water can be very thoughtful.
• There should be tissues present. If the host can provide this, great. If not, you as the facilitator should bring some.

Other Materials:

…Details are important, too. Forgotten details gives a sense of casualness that can seem like you don’t care about the group.

• As a facilitator, you’re responsible for picking up copies of the session from the church office. The first several sessions will be prepared in time for the first Facilitator’s SGM Group meeting in October. After that, we may notify you to pick them up in the main office.
• At all sessions, you will be doing a chalice lighting. You need to be sure that there is a chalice in the room where you will be meeting. You may want to bring your own. You will have a pack of matches; don’t forget to replace them when you’ve used up the first set.
• Do check for a full tissue box! People may cry—or just have sniffles.

Facilitator

You are the hand that guides. Mostly your touch will be very light. Sometimes you may need to step in further. Remember that it is not your job alone to make this group successful—the group members share this responsibility. It is your responsibility to support them and help them to be successful.

• Arrive a few minutes early to make sure everything is set and the chalice is present.
• Start the meeting on time with a warm, open tone.
• Make sure all members brought their handbook. If not, facilitate sharing. (Question, is UUCA still using a handbook for all members?)
• Help group members take turns reading parts of the agenda. As groups become used to this, you’ll need to do less prompting. Remember that some people don’t like to read out loud. You can even ask people to share this information at the first meeting so you don’t ask people who really dislike it.
• Set a tone of active listening and sharing from the heart. This is best done through modeling it yourself. When you take risks and share what’s real for you, you’ll let others know that this is a safe space to do the same. When you actively listen to others, this prompts others to do the same.
• Monitor group interactions and intervene when necessary—Is everyone getting time to share? Do some people take over? Are there interruptions? You may need to intervene directly or you may want to prompt a discussion during Check out time. We’ll talk about what challenges may arise and techniques for preventing and dealing with them.

Co-facilitator

You’re not in this alone! Invest in your relationship with your co-facilitator so that you become a team.

• Get together—in person­—before the first session. Share your hopes and fears as well as strengths and weaknesses about facilitating. Agree about who is, at least initially, doing what. A strong working relationship between facilitators is both essential for a strong SGM group, it’s also key to making sure you enjoy the experience.
• Communicate regularly. Ideally, you’ll get together once a month. At least talk on the phone!!
• Work out agreements for sharing the work so you each clearly know what you’re responsible for and know that the other will do his part.
• It’s important to talk about how the group is going. You’ll be able to work out shared approaches and support each other. One of you may see problems the other doesn’t. One of you may have a different understanding of what’s happening. Communicate!
• Communicate about what’s going on in your lives. Your co-facilitator can be a support to you. If things are hard, maybe she can do some things for you since you’re so busy. Later, when she’s flat out, you can pick up some slack.
• When with your group, support each other’s leadership. If you find yourself disagreeing, try not to do so publicly.
• If you discover that you have differences or disagreements, make space to talk about these so that they do not affect your group. Approach such disagreements within the facilitator’s covenant; be honest, compassionate, and direct. Understand that your co-facilitator is trying hard to do what he believes is best and know that you, too, are doing the same.

This resource is adapted from trainings used at the UU Church of Akron, OH and the UU Church of Kent, OH.