There are times when the congregation’s leadership feels that the minister needs to leave the congregation. Trust may have been broken, duties in the letter of agreement may not be fulfilled, or there are other problems that are causing harm to the congregation.

These endings are particularly hard on congregations, staff, and ministers, and can lead to congregational division, secrets, blaming, and/or misinformation.

It’s important for the congregational leadership to involve UUA Congregational Life staff to accompany them through the discernment and negotiation process. The minister usually invites a specially-trained UUMA Good Officer to accompany them through the process of negotiation. All parties involved consider the terms of the Letter of Agreement and the ongoing health and vitality of the congregation as they negotiate the ministerial ending.

Outlining a process and following it closely will enable all of the involved parties to keep clear boundaries and honor everyone’s dignity by keeping appropriate confidentiality.

Confidentiality Boundaries Among Leaders

Balancing transparency and confidentiality can be challenging for congregational board members, staff, and other leaders who have inside information during a conflicted ending. Healthy, vibrant systems need as much open communication as possible. When you follow a process, you can communicate that there is a process, you can outline the broad-brush steps, and communicate that the process is being followed.

Confidentiality and Healthy Disclosure for Boards

From LeaderLab

Balancing transparency and confidentiality can be challenging for congregational board members, staff, and other leaders who have access to sensitive information. Healthy, vibrant systems need as much open communication as possible. White Supremacy Culture sometimes uses “the need for…

Confidentiality and Healthy Disclosure for Boards

Communication

Leadership can set the tone by providing and communicating a clear and consistent message about the ending. The UUA’s field staff can be very helpful in crafting this in a way that strikes a balance between confidentiality and healthy disclosure, which can be shared with the congregation in an official announcement.

If there are a lot of strong feelings in the congregation, it’s helpful to offer healthy communication channels such as listening sessions or a board conversation table at coffee for congregants to vent their frustrations and ask questions.

Non-disclosure agreements are strongly discouraged. They create a veil of secrecy and can create mistrust in the congregational leadership.

Behaviors to Discourage

The congregational leadership should take the opportunity to remind the membership of the covenant, and do use it to guide behaviors.

Destructive, or bullying behaviors should be addressed immediately according to your policies and procedures. Discourage any blaming, shaming, raging, derogating, demeaning, controlling, punishing, or manipulative behavior.