Centering (5 minutes)

This is a time to make the transition from the busy world to the group experience. A member of the group may read the Behavioral Covenant of your church (or substitute this sample):

This Church is a sanctuary, a sacred space, and a safe space for all who enter. It is not only the architecture that makes it sacred or safe; it is the community within that makes it so. Accordingly, we who enter these walls promise:

To treat all people in ways that acknowledge their value and to refrain from treating them in ways that do not.

To be mindful that there are differences among us and to act and speak with kindness and respect.

To choose our inquiries and voice our opinions with responsible attention to our church’s seven principles, its commitments, and the diversity of our members.

To abide by our church’s established policies and if we disagree with them, either accept them or try to change them through the democratic process.

To respect each other’s spiritual journeys.

To keep the controversies that arise among us in perspective and to endeavor in good faith to resolve these issues equitably and compassionately.

To acknowledge that none of us is perfect and that we need each other.

Check-in (10 to 25 minutes)

Each person in the group has the opportunity to share something about his or her life. What significant events have taken place recently in your life? Have you accomplished something meaningful to you? Have you experienced any losses or setbacks? Have you had any insights or new ideas?

Group Discussion (45 to 70 minutes)

Our spiritual theme for this month is Covenant. Covenant is a theological theme which lies at the heart of Unitarian Universalism. Covenantal relationships demand personal responsibility, but covenantal relationships are not automatically broken or severed by inevitable human shortcomings. Following in the footsteps of our Puritan ancestors in Massachusetts, contemporary Unitarian Universalists continue to use covenantal relationships as the basis for organizing our congregations.

For group discussion, please consider the questions associated with one or more of the following numbered sections. You need not address all of these sections, and you need not address them in this order.

1. What do you appreciate about the Behavioral Covenant? (The text appears above as the centering reading.)
2. Here is a sample covenant for your covenant group to consider. It is adapted from the 2002 Unitarian Universalist Ministers Convocation. Each covenant group should have its own covenant.

• We covenant to attend each covenant group meeting if at all possible, and, should we not be able to attend, to let the covenant group leader know in advance.
• We covenant to listen with an open heart and open mind to each person’s check-in statements without responding until all have checked in, unless our understanding of what someone is saying requires a brief clarifying question.
• We covenant to recognize and honor both the equitable sharing of time for talking and the right of anyone who wishes to remain silent.
• We covenant to speak from our own hearts and experiences within this group, while avoiding the temptation to give advice, to lecture, or to preach.
• While not expecting or promising strict confidentiality within this group, we covenant to be sensitive to the privacy needs of others and to be respectful of group members when speaking to others about what is said here.
• We covenant to empower the covenant group leader to remind us of and call us back to these promises, should they feel the need to do so.
• We covenant to engage in some collective act of service to this congregation or to the larger community at least once every year.

What do you like about this covenant? What do you dislike? Would this covenant work for your group? Would you want to make a few changes for your group? Or would you want your group to start fresh and make up its own original covenant?

3. On the one hand, covenants differ from creeds because a covenant is a set of promises about behavior whereas a creed is a statement of belief. On the other hand, covenants differ from contracts because a covenantal relationship does not end if one party falls short of the covenant whereas a contract is nullified if one party fails to follow through.

Why is it appropriate for Unitarian Universalist congregations to be organized on the basis of a covenant rather than a creed? Why is it appropriate for our congregations to be organized on the basis of a covenant rather than a contract?

4. Unitarian Universalist historian Conrad Wright wrote, “The initial New England covenants of which we have record were simple statements. The Salem covenant of 1629 is as follows: ‘We Covenant with the Lord and one with an other; and doe bynd our selves in the presence of God, to walke together in all his waies, according as he is pleased to revel himself unto us in his Blessed word of truth.’ While there are words here with theological significance, such as ‘Lord,’ and ‘God,’ and ‘his Blessed word of truth,’ it should be remarked that this was not a creedal statement. The operative words are: ‘we . . . doe bynd our selves . . . to walke together.’ They are not: ‘we believe.’ So in a few of our churches, ancient covenants still serve their essential function: to make churches out of collections of individuals, to establish community. . . . In the eighteenth century, after the Great Awakening, when doctrinal divergence began to appear in the New England churches, and there came to be Arminians [the forerunners of Unitarians] as well as Calvinists [the conservative or orthodox group] in the land, creedal covenants began to come into use. The purpose was to maintain the purity of churches, defined now in terms of adherence to particular theological formulations. This seemed to the liberals of the day to be an unfortunate development, if not indeed a corruption of the congregational tradition. At any rate, we would no doubt agree that creedal covenants have no place in a doctrine of the liberal church. . . . The word ‘covenant’ survives in some of our churches. . . . And so long as the operative wording is ‘we unite’ and not ‘we believe,’ the essential form of a liberal church is there.”

If our church does not require adherence to a particular theological system as a requirement of membership, then on what basis do we unite?

5. The following covenant was quite widespread among Universalist churches. It specifies God as a partner in the covenant.

Love is the doctrine of this church,

The quest of truth is its sacrament,

And service is its prayer.

To dwell together in peace,

To seek knowledge in freedom,

To serve human need,

To the end that all souls shall grow into harmony with the Divine –

Thus do we covenant with each other and with God.

What do you like about this covenant? Would you be comfortable reciting this covenant? Would you say that a covenant is somehow more meaningful or more serious when God is included as a partner?

Conclusion (5 to 10 minutes)

What will you take away from this discussion? What would have made this time together more meaningful or satisfying to you? What did you enjoy? A group member may share these words from Margaret Wheatley:

There is no power greater than a community discovering what it cares about.

Ask “What’s possible?” not “What’s wrong?” Keep asking.

Notice what you care about.

Assume that many others share your dreams.

Be brave enough to start a conversation that matters.

Talk to people you know.

Talk to people you don’t know.

Talk to people you never talk to.

Be intrigued by the differences you hear.

Expect to be surprised.

Treasure curiosity more than certainty.

Invite in everybody who cares to work on what’s possible.

Acknowledge that everyone is an expert about something.

Know that creative solutions come from new connections.

Remember, you don’t fear people whose story you know.

Real listening always brings people closer together.

Trust that meaningful conversations can change the world.

Rely on human goodness. Stay together.