“Whatever you are, be a good one” - William Makepeace Thackeray

Every month, a great number of congregations reach out to Regional Staff to ask questions about growth. If you have experienced a decline in membership and/or attendance in the past three to five years, you are certainly not alone.

And I’m sure many of you have been surprised by how we conduct these conversations. The first question we always ask is, “Why do you want to grow?” Because our financial situation is dire. Because we can’t afford our minister. Because we have no children anymore. Because we can’t afford our mortgage. Because we’ve never had this few members. Very few folks say it is because there are people in their communities who are hurting and reaching out for love, and they have love to offer.

The next question is, “What do you believe is holding you back?” Our building. The parking lot. We don’t have enough space. We don’t have any children. No one offers programming. We don’t have any volunteers. We can’t even get a full board together. Our minister. We are lay-led. We can’t afford a religious educator. Very few folks say it is because they are not yet the beloved community that they envision.

Look, I’m going to give it to you straight: people want to go where it is fun to be. They don’t want to go where they are asked to serve right away. They don’t want to go where people don’t laugh, don’t celebrate, don’t love out loud. They don’t want to go to a space that is exactly the same as the harsh world they stepped in from. People want hope. They want beauty. They want joy. They want their spirits uplifted. There is no magic formula: people want to go where they can leave the world behind and make a better one.

You can do that at any size. You are fully equipped right now to offer everything the world needs so desperately right now. Whether there are eight or eight hundred of you, I am willing to bet you have untapped potential just waiting to blossom.

If you are a small congregation, be a good one. Your strength is in the way you know each other, the way you care for one another, the way you build strong multi-generational relationships.. You are flexible and able to respond to member needs with swift agility. Your programs consist of phone calls, meals shared, milestones celebrated. You have the ability to become rooted in local activism, seeking deep connections with other organizations working for justice. You create Beloved Community by welcoming folks into your homes and your hearts every time you gather. Give that away, and you will never be lost.

If you are a mid-sized congregation, be a good one. Your strength is in the way you hold each other, mentor each other, and believe in the big vision. You have a clear sense of who you are, and you are able to speak confidently and clearly about your mission. Your programs consist of classes and workshops, celebrations and milestones, rituals and worship, small groups and affinity groups. You have enough energy to thrive in any program you’d like to create while still maintaining a close community where it is possible to have deep and long-lasting relationships. You create Beloved Community through your extravagant sense of welcome and hospitality. Give that away, and you will never be lost.

If you are a large congregation, be a good one. Your strength is in the way you generously offer your members a way to be a part of something so much more. You offer a wide variety of methods to participate in that something, both inside your community and without. Your programs consist of large-scale worship and small group ministry, cluster workshops and religious education for everyone, leadership training and new member classes. You build Beloved Community through possibility and opportunity. Give that away, and you will never be lost.

Whatever you are, be a good one. Growth follows the good.

Many weeks, my family is on the road, co-creating Unitarian Universalism with congregations all over the Southern Region. I like to travel with my children, who have grown up in the Region with me, meeting so many UUs in their ten and twelve years. They always ask me, “Mommy, are we going to the fun church? The church with my friends? The church with the cookies? Mommy, are we going to the good church?” I can’t wait for the day that I can tell them absolutely yes every single week.