The Culture Wars Hit Home

By Renee Ruchotzke

Image of a brick wall painted like an american flag, with the stripes the colors of the rainbow.

Due to the timeliness of this issue, we are posting a special edition of Better Together.

Dear Beloved Trans Families,

There are evil forces in our country, and you have become their latest target. We, your cis-family siblings, are angry and scared and frustrated along with you. We support your fierce, protective love for the children as you plan your escape to safer ground and kinder community, and will grieve your absence if and when it comes to that.

We are hurt and confused that your transgender and gender expansive (TGE) children’s liberation from the constraints of the binary is eliciting such vile hatred and lies. The legislation being introduced is abuse. The deeply personal attacks on your families are venomous and traumatizing.

Please know that we love you, and are with you. Watch this video blessing (Vimeo) when you are feeling alone. Attend the UUA Trans Day of Visibility Virtual Party for Trans/Nonbinary Families if you can.

Deep in our hearts, we know that the attacks on your children are also attacks on our collective liberation. Your fight is our fight. We are using the tools we have to advocate for you and your children.

Deep in our hearts, we also know that we are getting closer to the practice of Beloved Community, because our support of our TGE children and siblings is an act of radical resistance to the deeply ingrained systems of oppression, extraction, and exploitation that date back thousands of years.

I know that this is a time where hope is hard to find, but here is where I find my hope:
We have inherited a culture that conflates violence and care, giving us adages like “spare the rod and spoil the child,” but we have resisted and instead chosen to love and nurture our children. We have also inherited a culture that privileges Patriarchy and “God-ordained” gender roles. When those fall--and I believe they will because of our collective resistance--the whole house of cards that is oppression could collapse in on itself.

These are dreadful times, but you are not alone. You are embraced with the love of your UU community, both near and far.

Rev. Renee Ruchotzke

About the Author

Renee Ruchotzke

Rev. Renee Ruchotzke (ruh-HUT-skee) is a Congregational Life Consultant and program manager for Leadership Development.

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