Workshop 10: Love

Beautiful orange sunset over a deep blue ocean. — Tapestry is Sunsetting

The UUA is no longer updating Tapestry of Faith programs.

Part of Principled Commitment: A Program for Unitarian Universalist Couples

In This Section

Introduction
From Principled Commitment

Love is an action, never simply a feeling. — bell hooks (sic), contemporary author, professor, and activist Quote from hooks’s book All About Love. Her name is properly spelled in all lowercase. Love is the essence of our most meaningful relationships. It is the glue that maintains a couple’s…
Workshop-at-a-Glance
From Principled Commitment

Activity Minutes Welcoming and Entering Opening 10 Activity 1: Check-in 10 Activity 2: How Do I Know I Am Loved? 20 Activity 3: The Many Facets of Love 35 Activity 4: Tender Points 30 Closing 15 Alternate Activity 1: Faith in Action — Articulating Our UU Faith 25 Alternate Activity 2: Personal…
Spiritual Preparation
From Principled Commitment

Take some time to complete and reflect upon Activity 4, Tender Points, on your own. If you are going to lead Alternate Activity 2, Personal Mini-Altars, consider creating your own personal altar to use as an example in the workshop.
Welcoming and Entering
From Principled Commitment

Materials for Activity Name tags Markers Sign-in sheet Pen or pencil An agenda of this workshop’s activities on newsprint or a digital slide (see Preparation) Optional: Computer, digital projector, and screen Optional: Copies of workshop series schedule Preparation for Activity Using the…
Opening
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 10 minutes Materials for Activity Altar or centering table Cloth for covering altar or centering table Chalice and candle Matches or lighter Leader Resource 1: Order of Service — Love Preparation for Activity Prepare the altar or centering table with the cloth you have brought, a…
Activity 1: Check-in
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 10 minutes Description of Activity Invite participants to take turns briefly sharing insights they have had since the previous workshop on commitment. Ask: Since the last workshop, have you changed anything about how you relate as a couple?…
Activity 2: How Do I Know I Am Loved?
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 20 minutes Materials for Activity Newsprint Easel Markers Low-stick masking tape Clock, watch, or timer Bell or chime Copies of Handout 1: Saying “I Love You” Without the Usual Words (one per participant) Description of Activity Ask participants to recall how they felt during the…
Activity 3: The Many Facets Of Love
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 35 minutes Materials for Activity Newsprint sheet with triangle diagram (see Preparation) Newsprint sheet with list of questions (see Preparation) Easel Copies of Handout 2: The Triangular Theory of Love (one per participant) Preparation for Activity Study Handout 2, The Triangular…
Activity 4: Tender Points
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 30 minutes Materials for Activity Copies of Handout 3: Tender Points (one per participant) Leader Resource 2: Tender Points Guidelines Newsprint sheet with circle diagram (see Preparation) Newsprint sheet with list of guidelines (see Preparation) Easel Pens or pencils Tables or har…
Closing
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 15 minutes Materials for Activity Copies of customized Taking It Home handout (see Preparation) Preparation for Activity Review the Taking It Home section of this workshop. Download it to your computer, customize it for your group, and make a printout or photocopy for each…
Leader Reflection and Planning
From Principled Commitment

With your co-leader, take some time after the workshop to evaluate the session and plan for the final session. Consider these questions: What parts of the workshop seemed to engage the most people? Why? When did we seem particularly effective as co-leaders? Why?…
Alternate Activity 1: Faith In Action - Articulating Our Uu Faith
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 25 minutes Materials for Activity Copies of Handout 4: Who Are Unitarian Universalists? (one per small group) Pens or pencils Tables or hard surfaces for writing Newsprint Easel Markers Preparation for Activity Set up tables, or find books or other hard surfaces for writing.
Alternate Activity 2: Personal Mini-altars
From Principled Commitment

Activity time: 45 minutes Materials for Activity Metal mint tins with hinged tops (one per participant) A variety of materials to cover and decorate the tins, such as fabric scraps, tissue paper, embroidery thread, small beads, sequins, and tiny bells Old magazines (a variety, for cutting out…
Taking It Home: Love
From Principled Commitment

Affection Connection — Love Extend your exploration of love by trying this activity on your own. For Couples: Couple Covenant Take some time together to work on your couple covenant. You are encouraged to refer to your work from earlier workshops….
Handout 1: Saying 'I Love You' without the Usual Words
From Principled Commitment

Bring home a small gift for your partner, for no reason at all. Plan a surprise weekend away. It doesn’t have to be far away or expensive, as long as it’s just the two of you. Leave a message on your partner’s voice mail saying how important that person is in your life. Do a chore your partner…
Handout 2: The Triangular Theory Of Love
From Principled Commitment

In his essay “Triangulating Love,” Robert J. Sternberg, professor of psychology at Tufts University, describes love in a way that may be particularly helpful to Principled Commitment participants….
Handout 3: Tender Points
From Principled Commitment
Handout 4: Who Are Unitarian Universalists
From Principled Commitment

Describe Unitarian Universalism by filling in your group’s responses to the questions below. Who are Unitarian Universalists? What are our strengths? What are our roles? What are our important values? What are our ethics? How do we want to relate to the world? How do we want to relate to…
Leader Resource 1: Order Of Service - Love
From Principled Commitment

Follow this Order of Service as you lead the opening of Workshop 10, Love. Welcome Chalice Lighting Principles Guided Meditation Reading Welcome Welcome participants. Explain that this workshop is devoted to the concept of love….
Leader Resource 2: Tender Points Guidelines
From Principled Commitment

Copy these points onto a newsprint page for use during Activity 4, Tender Points. To know me is to know my tender points, the sensitive and the sacred, and how they influence my life. To be my friend is to accept and respect all of those points as an integral part of my being….
Leader Resource 3: Personal Altar Questions
From Principled Commitment

Copy these questions onto a newsprint sheet for use during Alternate Activity 2, Personal Mini-Altars. Who am I? What are my strengths? What are my roles? What are my important values? What are my ethics? How do I want to relate to the world? How do I want to relate to individuals?…
Find Out More
From Principled Commitment

hooks, bell [sic]. All About Love: New Visions. Harper, 2001. Sternberg, Robert J. C… Arrow: The Course of Love through Time. Cambridge University Press, 2000. Sternberg, Robert J., and Karin Weis. http://www.amazon.com/New-Psychology-Love-Robert-Sternberg/dp/030011697… New Psychology of Love.