Bereaved Children and Teens: A Support Guide for Parents and Professionals, by Earl A. Grollman (Boston: Beacon Press, 1996), compiles the wisdom of 14 experts in a comprehensive guide to helping children and adolescents cope with the emotional, religious, social, and physical consequences of a loved one's death. Talking about Death: A Dialogue between Parent and Child, by the same author, is a compassionate guide for adults and children to read together which features a read-along story. It answers children's questions about death and provides a list of resources and organizations that can help.
The Grieving Child by Helen Fitzgerald (New York: Fireside, 1992) offers guidance on how to explain death to children and includes sections on visiting the dying and attending a funeral.
For help in guiding children to find their own answers to a variety of topics, including death, read Small Wonder by Jean Grasso Fitzpatrick (New York: Penguin, 1995).
The Tenth Good Thing about Barney by Judith Viorst (New York: Atheneum, 1987). This classic book for school-age children tells how a little boy copes and finds meaning when his cat dies.
A good source for readings for memorial services is Carl Seaburg's Great Occasions: Readings for the Celebration of Birth, Coming-of-Age, Marriage, and Death (Boston: Skinner House, 1984).