Workshop 2: Humility Part of Principled Commitment: A Program for Unitarian Universalist Couples In This Section Introduction From Principled Commitment Religion is to do right. It is to love, it is to serve, it is to think, it is to be humble. — Ralph Waldo Emerson, nineteenth-century author and speaker, trained as a Unitarian minister Humility is a virtue that for too long has had a bad rap in our Unitarian Universalist religious movement and... Workshop-at-a-Glance From Principled Commitment ACTIVITY MINUTES Welcoming and Entering Opening 10 Activity 1: Check-in 10 Activity 2: A Healthy UU Humility 15 Activity 3: What Don't We Know? 20 Activity 4: Communication Pitfalls 45 Activity 5: Spiritual Practices That Promote Humility 15 Closing 5 Alternate Activity 1: Faith in Action — UU... Spiritual Preparation From Principled Commitment Consider the guiding Principle for this session, "Justice, equity, and compassion in human relations." Take a moment to reflect on how being open and teachable encourages healthy human relations. How does this connect to your sense of spirituality? Read through Leader Resource 3, Gottman and the... Welcoming and Entering From Principled Commitment Materials for Activity Name tags Markers Sign-in sheet Pen or pencil Copies of the completed contact information sheet from Workshop 1 (see Preparation) An agenda of this workshop's activities on newsprint or a digital slide (see Preparation) Optional: Computer, digital projector, and screen... Opening From Principled Commitment Activity time: 10 minutes Materials for Activity Altar or centering table Cloth for covering altar or centering table Chalice and candle Matches or lighter Singing the Living Tradition hymnbook (at least one copy) Leader Resource 1: Order of Service - Humility Preparation for Activity Prepare the... Activity 1: Check-in From Principled Commitment Activity time: 10 minutes Description of Activity Invite participants to take turns checking in by saying their name and, if they wish, briefly sharing insights from the first workshop. Ask whether couples have noticed any changes in how they relate to each other. If desired, you can move this... Activity 2: A Healthy Uu Humility From Principled Commitment Activity time: 15 minutes Materials for Activity Leader Resource 2: Thoughts on UU Humility Newsprint with prepared list (see Preparation) Marker Easel Optional: Low-stick masking tape Preparation for Activity Study Leader Resource 2, Thoughts on UU Humility. Be prepared to incorporate these... Activity 3: What Don't We Know? From Principled Commitment Activity time: 20 minutes Materials for Activity Optional: Easel, newsprint, and marker Description of Activity Share these or similar words to focus the activity: What allows us to be humble in spirit within our relationships? Each of you found the courage to get close to your partner after your... Activity 4: Communication Pitfalls From Principled Commitment Activity time: 45 minutes Materials for Activity Leader Resource 3: Gottman and the Four Horsemen Newsprint sheet with prepared list (see Preparation) Easel Preparation for Activity Study Leader Resource 3, Gottman and the Four Horsemen, so that you can present the material to participants in you... Activity 5: Spiritual Practices That Promote Humility From Principled Commitment Activity time: 15 minutes Materials for Activity Optional: Easel, newsprint, and marker Description of Activity Share with participants: According to Unitarian Universalist minister Scott Alexander, a spiritual practice is "any activity or attitude in which you can regularly and intentionally... Closing From Principled Commitment Activity time: 5 minutes Materials for Activity Copies of customized Taking It Home handout (see Preparation) Preparation for Activity Review the Taking It Home section of this workshop and decide which "Affection Connection" options you will encourage participants to do.... Leader Reflection and Planning From Principled Commitment With your co-leader, take some time after the workshop to evaluate the session and plan for future sessions. Consider these questions: What parts of the workshop seemed to engage the most people? Why? When did we seem particularly effective as co-leaders? Why?... Alternate Activity 1: Faith In Action - Uu "horsemen" From Principled Commitment Activity time: 30 minutes Materials for Activity Newsprint with "four horsemen" (see Preparation) Low-stick masking tape Preparation for Activity If you haven't already done so for Activity 4, Communication Pitfalls, write the names of the "four horsemen" on newsprint: Criticism, Contempt,... Alternate Activity 2: How We Met From Principled Commitment Activity time: 30 minutes Description of Activity This activity is offered for groups that need more time to get to know each other. If offered, it should be presented early in the workshop. "How we met" stories can be a good way for workshop participants to get to know each other better as couples. Alternate Activity 3: Small Group Discussions On Humility From Principled Commitment Activity time: 30 minutes Materials for Activity Newsprint (at least one sheet per group) Markers (at least one per group) Low-stick masking tape Questions listed on newsprint or digital slide (see Preparation) Optional: Computer, digital projector, and screen Preparation for Activity Write the... Alternate Activity 4: Affirming The Second Principle From Principled Commitment Activity time: 20 minutes Description of Activity Invite couples to identify, in couples, some practices that affirm justice, equity, and compassion in their relationship. These can be current practices or practices desired for the future. After five or ten minutes of discussion, invite the large... Taking It Home: Humility From Principled Commitment Affection Connection — Humility Extend your exploration of humility by trying one or more of these activities on your own. For Individuals: Reflecting on Expectations Take some time to write individually, exploring the following questions: When did I know I wanted a long-term commitment with my... Leader Resource 1: Order of Service - Humility From Principled Commitment Follow this Order of Service as you lead the opening of Workshop 2, Humility. Welcome Chalice Lighting Principle Reading Guided Meditation Poem Welcome Welcome participants. Explain that this workshop is devoted to the concept of humility as the basis for honest and authentic interaction. Leader Resource 2: Thoughts on UU Humility From Principled Commitment You may wish to incorporate these thoughts into Activity 2, A Healthy UU Humility. The Reverend Forrest Church notes that the words human, humane, humanitarian, humor, humility, humble, and humus (the organic portion of soil) are all related.... Leader Resource 3: Gottman and the Four Horsemen From Principled Commitment How do we apply the idea of humility to the ways we communicate as couples? Do we need to be meek and noncommittal? Do we always need to communicate in "I statements"?... Find Out More From Principled Commitment Gottman, John M., and Nan Silver. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert. Three Rivers Press, 1999. PREVIOUS: Find Out More UP: Principled Commitment NEXT: Introduction Download all of Principled Commitment (Word) (PDF) to edit or print.