Conflict Transformation Skills for Leadership Development
Conflict Skills are part of the recommended leadership development competencies.
Conflict Skills include:
- Understanding the difference between unhealthy and creative conflict.
- Being able to diffuse unhealthy conflict.
- Being able to be present to and engage in healthy conflict.
We are the “Living Tradition” that continually engages with our practices and beliefs to discern the “permanent” from the “transient.” We know that we must continually breathe new life into our congregations.
- Switch roles with someone—at work, at play, at church or with the family.
- Understand your own personality type or style when under stress using your favorite personality typing system (e.g. Myers-Briggs, Enneagram, Keirsey, etc.).
- Learn your own conflict style in different settings (work, home, church).
- Church Conflict (YouTube, 32:00)—A Systems Perspective with Peter Steinke at UU University
- “A Mediation Simulation” (YouTube) with Dr. Nancy Love of the PULSE Institute explains a five-part model of the meditation process
- Finding the Optimal Level of Conflict by David R. Brubaker
- Respectfully Disagreeing: How Dialogue Works to Transform Conflict by Marlis McCollum
- Is Conflict a Good Thing? from the Alban Institute
- Twenty Observations about Troubled Congregations by Peter Steinke
- Avoiding Drama Trauma by Rev. Renee Ruchotzke
- The Sabotage of Rumors by Arthur Paul Boers
- A Short Primer on Congregational Hostage Negotiations by Derek Penwell
- Power of a Positive No (PDF) for Oxford Leadership by William Ury
- Dealing with Difﬁcult People by Don Skinner (Podcast and Article)
- Stand Up to Problem People by Don Skinner (Podcast and Article)
- Take Time to Covenant by Eunice Benton (Podcast and Article)
- Your Excuses are Gone—How to Grow a Big Church Anywhere (Even In New England). An Interview with Josh Gagnon
- To Dwell Together in Peace (Safety Policies 102—Covenant) (free registration required): Covenants and Right Relations Policies with Frances Sink and Rev. Renee Ruchotzke
- Drawing the Line (Safety Policies 106—Disruptive Behavior) (free registration required): Disruptive Behavior Policies and Procedures with Rev. Renee Ruchotzke
- Meeting Resistance: Dealing with Conflict (YouTube) (47:15) with Mark Bernstein
- 10 Good Ways to Manage Difficult Behavior (YouTube) (1:13:32) with Nancy Combs Morgan and Lisa Presley
- Practicing Pluralism: Dealing with Conflict (49:42) with Rev. Georgette Wonders and Rev. Ian Evison
- Unitarian Universalist Association Conflict Management Resources
- Congregational Life Dynamics and Conflict Management (Free PDF, 23 pages) (2005) UUA
- The Little Book of Conflict Transformation (2003) by John Paul Lederach
- Promise and Peril: Understanding and Managing Change and Conflict in Congregations (2009) by David R. Brubaker
- Conflict Management in Congregations (2001) David B. Lott, ed.
- Congregational Fitness: Healthy Practices for Layfolk by Denise W. Goodman
- Difficult Conversations: Taking Risks, Acting with Integrity by Katie Day
- Developing Your Conflict Competence: A Hands-On Guide for Leaders, Managers, Facilitators, and Teams by Craig E. Runde
- Leadership and Conflict (1982) by Speed Leas
- Discover Your Conflict Management Style (1998) by Speed Leas