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Braver/Wiser Archive
Braver/Wiser Archive
Worship
  • No Longer Claiming "Divorced"

    I used to be very conscious of the fact that I was “a single mom” — so self-conscious, in fact, that I would add that I was “a divorced mother,” as if this extra piece of information somehow made things better; as if people would judge me less if they knew that I did, in fact,...
    By Rayla D. Mattson | 2/14/2018
  • Good Enough

    I call myself a recovering perfectionist. People usually laugh when I say that, not realizing how serious I am. Perfectionism has robbed me of joy and kept me from being present in my life. I remember a chamber ensemble concert in high school, for example, when we played a...
    By Lindasusan Ulrich | 1/31/2018
  • Telling a New Story

    I thought about my first tattoo for a long time, but when a pregnancy test unexpectedly came back positive, my ink research took a new direction. I didn’t cancel my trip to the tattoo parlor; birthing this baby at this moment would harm everyone involved, and I knew that I would...
    By Mandie McGlynn | 1/20/2018
  • Wanting to Break Free

    I'm often accused of being “too reserved,” and there’s truth at the heart of that. On the spiciness scale, my expressiveness is on the mild end. I’m sure that stems from my disdain for being the center of attention. Still, I'm frequently advised to "loosen up," and offered the...
    By DeReau K. Farrar | 1/16/2018
  • Mrs. Cash's Oranges

    I grew up in a three-bedroom, cinderblock ranch style house with a two-car garage and a mess of tiger lilies and saw palmettos in the front yard. There was a lake at the end of the street — one of the few in Central Florida left unspoiled, because its proximity to the railroad...
    By Teresa Honey Youngblood | 1/10/2018
  • Stopping to Help

    Why is it that some people stop to help and others just keep going? In my adult life, I’ve happened upon a number of memorable car accidents. In one, a mother was unconscious while her small child was screaming in the back of the car. My friend and I raced to pull the child...
    By Rayla D. Mattson | 1/3/2018
  • The Possibility of Redemption

    “Is your congregation handicap accessible?” “Yes, it is,” I replied. “Great. I'll see if my wife will bring me on Sunday.” There he was the very next Sunday. Over the next few months, I learned a lot about John. A Vietnam veteran who returned home to serve as a police...
    By Robin Tanner | 12/26/2017
  • Messy, Wildly Imperfect Love

    If I were going to write a book about my life as a minister, there would definitely be a part about last Christmas Eve, when I lost my sermon. My sermon was about big things coming undone, like our country, and the theory that when everything is falling apart around us,...
    By Elea Kemler | 12/20/2017
  • Wired for Connection

    It’s a familiar scene each holiday: no matter how meticulously the strings of lights were put away, they always seem to come out a tangled mess. What happens to them all through the year as they wait in their boxes? And so the tradition of untangling the lights begins. We...
    By Erin Powers | 12/13/2017
  • An Adequate Christmas

    You ever read those magazine articles about how to "survive Christmas"? As if Christmas were some kind of endurance event? To me, that all seems just a little extreme. Then again, it can come from the other side, too—all those jangling jingle bells, with people wanting to put...
    By Jake Morrill | 11/29/2017
  • I Ride Bus

    My three-year-old is almost completely nonverbal. Every day when she gets off the bus, I ask her the same question: I ask her how her day was, and every day I get the same answer: ”Momma, I ride bus.” I ask her what she had for lunch and who she played with. I ask her if she...
    By Rayla D. Mattson | 11/22/2017
  • The Dynamics of Silence

    Silence is dynamic: it does things. When silence becomes a living character in our personal narratives, it’s often an accomplice to power. When I was a new seminary graduate still short of the red-tape requirements for ministry, one of my mentors, who was married,...
    By Erika A. Hewitt | 11/15/2017
  • Holding Space for Truth to Bloom

    Content Warning: This reflection refers to the loss of an infant. There is a moment—a moment when all eyes turn to you: the minister, the lawyer, the teacher, the surgeon. It will happen thousands of times in a career. Years in, I surely can’t count how many. But no one...
    By Lisa Bovee-Kemper | 10/25/2017
  • Making Space for Our Doubts

    The Christmas Eve pageant had been beautiful and sweet, but as a stressed out director of religious education, I will admit that the best part about it was that it was over. I sat myself down at the community potluck with my hot cocoa and relaxed for what felt like the first...
    By Becky Brooks | 10/18/2017
  • Pulled by a Fragile Thread

    5:00 a.m. A child is stirring… and up. Now I am, too. We call out to one another in the dark hallway. Call and response, we find one another. She crawls into our bed babbling about a turtle, then requests Cheerios. My phone buzzes with alerts. I pick it...
    By Robin Tanner | 10/4/2017
  • Between Wonder and Fear

    A few years ago, when we’d been married only a short time, my husband asked me what I wanted to do on our trip to Sedona, Arizona. I thought a minute and then asked, “Could we go on a hot air balloon ride?” He made the arrangements. Once in Sedona, we got up at 5:00 a.m., saw...
    By Elizabeth Harding | 9/27/2017
  • Multicultural Joy

    My second daughter got married in April. I had never been in such a place filled with Asian Americans. My husband and I are from Japan, and the groom’s parents are from Taiwan. Most family members and their partners looked East Asian, and so did most of the couple’s friends....
    By Yuri Yamamoto | 9/20/2017
  • "Change" Is a Word on Wheels

    Every Sunday morning, the church choir and I spend time in reflection and silence before we begin the first worship service. I often offer my thoughts on the day's theme or the state of the world, providing context to the message we bring. On a recent Sunday, I said to the...
    By DeReau K. Farrar | 9/12/2017
  • Love Showed Up

    What is your heart doing right now? “Remembering. Remembering!” —from Mary Oliver's "When Did It Happen?," in Felicity Patricia was our hospice patient for three years. She had lung cancer, and by the time I got to know her she had beaten all odds. Patricia was...
    By Elizabeth Harding | 8/23/2017
  • Who We Can Turn To

    Sometimes, being on social media is actually good for my self-care. In the days leading up to the white nationalists marching in Charlottesville, and during the weekend, and since, I have found myself comforted and empowered by being part of a community that stretches beyond...
    By Aisha Ansano | 8/16/2017
  • Blessed Curses, Cursed Blessings

    In the summer of 2002, my partners and I found the best apartment in the entire East Bay. It was on Harrison street in Oakland, just a short jog uphill from Lake Merritt. We had the whole top floor of a triplex, with garages at street level. The living room facing the street was...
    By Becky Brooks | 8/9/2017
  • Grateful to Our Teachers

    I had been at sea for ten days. I’d visited this city before—but not on a Sunday, so I’d never been to the UU congregation there.  On Sunday morning, I walked into the sanctuary where a greeter recognized that I was a visitor and welcomed me with a friendly greeting....
    By Seanan R. Holland | 8/2/2017
  • Nourishing Our Whole Selves

    It had been a long week, and I was so. tired. After being cooped up at work all day, my partner and I decided to take a walk to a local burger place to grab some tasty food that didn’t require much work on our part. As we were getting ready to walk out the door, I realized that...
    By Aisha Ansano | 7/26/2017
  • Love's Pronoun Is Plural

    My son, Caleb, and I went to Starbucks on a recent Saturday morning. We often do this as a prelude to the weekly grocery shopping. It sweetens the deal, which is important, as he is about to be 14 and on the autism spectrum. Both of these factors contribute to his resistance to...
    By Elea Kemler | 7/19/2017
  • Love Always Protects

    I have some problems with Paul, the writer of this letter. I also have some problems with the translations in the New International Version of the Bible. All that aside, there’s something deeply moving for me about the idea of a love that will always have my back. "Always"—...
    By DeReau K. Farrar | 7/12/2017
  • Becoming a "Real" American

    When I took the Intercultural Development Inventory* assessment in 2014, my trainer told me that I had some issues with my own cultural values and practices. It’s called Reversal Orientation, she said. I responded, “Why do you think I came to this country? I hated it there!”...
    By Yuri Yamamoto | 7/5/2017
  • Life Tips from a Pottery Wheel

    Over the past couple of years, what started off as a hobby has turned into a true spiritual practice: wheel thrown pottery. I would love to tell you that I picked it up immediately, that I’ve become an expert potter with showcases and gallery openings and… okay, I can’t stop...
    By Tim Atkins | 6/28/2017
  • Green Beans

    I want to tell you something about the June garden. Not about the knee-high rainbow chard or the hot pink zinnias, though both are splendid. Look closer: beneath heart-shaped leaves, hiding parallel to their own twining vines, are the humble treasures of early summer: the green...
    By Teresa Honey Youngblood | 6/21/2017
  • Do the Next Thing with Love

    By the time Karate class rolled around Monday evening, I was still dazed. The day before — June 12, 2016 — my kids wanted to know why the parents were so sad. I told them I was crying for a really big group of people who had died in the night: fifty people. We got out their...
    By Becky Brooks | 6/14/2017
  • Keeping Our Connections Strong

    I feel like I'm on a constant hunt for hope these days. I have to be: every time I look at my phone or open my laptop, I’m overwhelmed by stories of violence, disrespect for life, greed, and selfishness. When I listen to my friends and loved ones or to conversations in coffee...
    By Sean Parker Dennison | 6/7/2017
  • To Be Suspicious

    As a born traveler, I love the novelty of discovering a familiar thing in a new setting. And what’s more familiar than a white clapboard church building on the town green? On my time away from the pulpit I often go for long drives in the hill country around my home in central...
    By Daniel Gregoire | 5/31/2017
  • Delicious Ambiguity

    How is it that I, a minister and known skeptic, am able to a) not run around screaming that the sky is falling and, b) do my job at all? This question perplexes those belonging to religious traditions that offer comfort in the form of certainty. For some, answers to life’s...
    By Marisol Caballero | 5/17/2017
  • What Do We Do with Our Pain?

    People are in pain all around us, all of the time. How can we be companions to those in pain, and bear witness, so that pain can be transformed into something less harmful? Last week, the crowd on a New York City subway herded me into a corner against someone’s seat: a man in...
    By Erika A. Hewitt | 5/10/2017
  • Confessing Communities

    "Uh, where’s the booth?” Having been raised by a Christian-on-the-periphery, New Age mom and a Buddhist-leaning dad, I was a little perplexed at my first confession. I was eight years old, attending a Catholic school. That’s a whole different story, but let’s stay with the...
    By Robin Tanner | 5/3/2017
  • Good Intentions and Incomplete Efforts

    I’ve been doing a lot of guest preaching lately and it’s always a little awkward. I often don’t know how the congregation is used to doing things. Recently I’ve tripped on my robe, forgotten to extinguish the chalice, called someone by the wrong name, and gave the wrong musician...
    By Sean Parker Dennison | 3/29/2017
  • Hope for a Great Sea Change

    With a name like mine, it’s easy to guess I’m Irish. My forebears were among the millions who struggled to escape Ireland’s disastrous Potato Famine (1845-1852). With his six siblings, my great-grandfather Patrick boarded one of the infamous “coffin ships” out of Liverpool. When...
    By Maureen Killoran | 3/22/2017
  • Singing Out for Love's Return

    For twelve years, Daisy has been the best dog any person could love. But last week, when she disappeared into the woods? That wasn’t what I was thinking. As I tramped along the wet trail, calling for her, other words came to mind. We’ve rambled together through these woods...
    By Jake Morrill | 3/8/2017
  • Expect Nothing

    I had finally begun to relax—a bit. We were en route to Pennsylvania. My friend, a formal part of our “framily,” was visiting. We decided a visit to a crayon factory was the perfect winter outing for toddlers. The day was clear and crisp with typical bumper-to-bumper traffic for...
    By Robin Tanner | 3/1/2017
  • Both the Burning and the Light

    About six months ago, I got a new tattoo. It’s a lit match on my right wrist, added to an arm full of paintbrushes, pens and other art supplies. As a minister, my tattoos are sometimes controversial, and I was a little nervous about what people would think about this addition....
    By Sean Parker Dennison | 2/1/2017
  • Love Is the Last Thing to Ration

    When I picked up her call, Kira’s voice was thick with tears. Kira, one of my best friends, is the mother of 4-year old twins, working full-time, and grieving a recent divorce — which means she’s also learning how to be a single parent. "I lost it tonight,” she confessed in a...
    By Erika A. Hewitt | 1/25/2017
  • Tiny Deaths

    We sat on the back steps watching transfixed as hundreds of rust-red spiders, big as thumbs, dropped on strands of silk out of the pecan tree in the backyard. It was exquisite, a great exodus of faith and instinct, leaping from one life and floating down to the next. But then...
    By Teresa Honey Youngblood | 1/18/2017
  • Somebody Like That

    “Did that man just strap a gun to his belt?” My 10-year-old squinted, looking across the parking lot of the grocery co-op. I had seen it, too: a middle-aged white man had stepped out of his pick-up truck, taken out a black holster, and strapped it on, pulling his shirt down over...
    By Teresa Honey Youngblood | 11/30/2016
  • Help Us Never to Forget

    All right voters, it’s election season! We’re down to the remaining candidates, and we are the voters of this country. The question before each of us, perhaps already answered on your early ballot, is How shall I choose? If the power still lies in the hands and the will of...
    By Daniel Gregoire | 11/2/2016
  • Universal Shorthand

    I have begun to pray recently. This may sound odd coming from a minister, but as much as I adore leading prayer in front of a congregation, on the state capitol steps, or at a patient’s bedside, I’ve always held a certain amount of shame that prayer isn't central to my spiritual...
    By Marisol Caballero | 10/26/2016
  • An Unlikely Teacher of Love

    He was, I am told, just a dog. But who was it that, fresh from the litter, climbed onto my chest, licked my face, and rubbed his pink baby nose against my cheek? Who chewed the edges of my only antique desk? Who hiked to the top of Multnomah Falls, snug and safe in my...
    By Maureen Killoran | 10/12/2016

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