BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT
A Tapestry of Faith Program for Adults
WORKSHOP 1: TELLING OUR STORY: MULTIPLE TRUTHS AND MULTIPLE REALITIES
BY MARK HICKS
© Copyright 2012 Unitarian Universalist Association.
Published to the Web on 9/29/2014 11:41:04 PM PST.
This program and additional resources are available on the UUA.org web site at
www.uua.org/religiouseducation/curricula/tapestryfaith.
WORKSHOP OVERVIEW
INTRODUCTION
What is true is that for Unitarian Universalism to move into a vibrant future, we will need to mine our past for stories of resistance to oppression, stories of openness to new ways of being religious, stories of transformation that have built new understandings into our narrative of who we are. — Rev. William G. Sinkford, past president of the Unitarian Universalist Association
This workshop introduces key program elements including stories, dialogue, personal reflection, and sharing with others in small and large groups.
Participants consider questions of confidentiality and emotional and spiritual safety as the group begins its journey together. The workshop invites them to engage with their own experiences and those of others as they explore affirming and marginalizing experiences.
Before leading this workshop, review the accessibility guidelines in the program Introduction under Integrating All Participants.
GOALS
This workshop will:
LEARNING OBJECTIVES
Participants will:
WORKSHOP-AT-A-GLANCE
Activity | Minutes |
Opening | 2 |
Activity 1: Welcome and Introductions | 30 |
Activity 2: Making a Covenant | 10 |
Activity 3: Outsider Experiences | 15 |
Activity 4: Learning from the Other Within — Theater of Voices | 55 |
Closing | 8 |
SPIRITUAL PREPARATION
As you prepare to lead the first workshop, reflect on how your life's journey has led you to this moment. Why is Building the World We Dream About important to you? Share your experiences and reasons with your co-leader.
Read carefully all the stories in Leader Resource 2, Affirming Experiences and Marginalizing Experiences, pausing for a time after each one to consider your own experiences of inclusion and exclusion. When have you felt as though you mattered? When have you felt marginalized or excluded? Can you recall times in your congregation when you mattered? Times when you were marginalized?
WORKSHOP PLAN
OPENING (2 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Light the chalice or invite a participant to light it while you read Laura Hershey's poem, "Telling," aloud.
ACTIVITY 1: WELCOME AND INTRODUCTIONS (30 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Invite participants to introduce themselves, saying their name and where they are from, and then to share a story that is often told about them by family or friends. For example, "My partner always says I never order food without asking 20 questions of the wait staff." Explain that each person has one minute to tell their story and that you will gently enforce the time limit in order to keep the workshop moving. Go first, to model one-minute storytelling. Then encourage participants to speak as they are ready and comfortable. You may wish to use an object such as a stone or talking stick that each person can hold while they speak. If the group is large, you may choose to simply go around the room and ask people to say their name and where they are from, and then form groups of four or five to share one-minute stories.
Indicate the questions you have posted. Invite participants to generate a list of reasons they have chosen to be part of this program. Write each response on newsprint.
Indicate or distribute the program goals (Leader Resource 4). Read them aloud or have volunteers read.
Including All Participants
To accommodate different learning styles (for example, aural versus visual learners) and to be inclusive of people who are visually impaired, read aloud the posted questions, handouts, and any other written materials.
ACTIVITY 2: MAKING A COVENANT (10 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Distribute Handout 1. Invite participants to read it quickly, noting that most will have already read these guidelines before this workshop.
Call attention to the posted agreements. Write on newsprint participants' suggestions, concerns, or additions to the list.
Decide together if you will make changes to the guidelines presented in the handout or to the posted agreements which will become the group covenant.
Invite the group to covenant together to honor and uphold the covenant. Ask each person to signal assent by saying "yes" or nodding. Explain that the covenant is a living document; it can and should be changed as the group evolves.
ACTIVITY 3: OUTSIDER EXPERIENCES (15 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Make sure each participant has a journal and a pen/pencil.
Explain that the journals have two purposes: To record ideas, quotes, and concepts from workshops, and to record participants' reflections, thoughts, and feelings. Invite participants to use any form they wish, such as poetry, bulleted points, idea webs, symbols, or narrative/story.
Now, say:
I invite you to begin your journal work by recording a powerful experience in which you felt like an outsider. Use the questions posted on newsprint to help guide your remembering. This is a private journal exercise. You will not be sharing this story in the workshop. Instead, you are asked to hold the story in your heart and use it as a point of reference in our future discussions.
Allow ten minutes for writing. Then invite comments and observations about the experience of recalling such a moment.
Including All Participants
For people with physical disabilities who may not be able to write, find a private area where the person can record their story or dictate it confidentially to a facilitator.
ACTIVITY 4: LEARNING FROM THE OTHER WITHIN — THEATER OF VOICES (55 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Remind participants that the experience of being either an insider or outsider in a group is a universal human experience. Say:
You are invited to take part in and witness a Theater of Voices that will present real life experiences of contemporary Unitarian Universalists—some affirming and some marginalizing. If you are part of the audience, make yourself comfortable as you prepare to listen to stories from Unitarian Universalist persons who identify as People of Color and others marginalized by race or ethnicity and Unitarian Universalists who identify as White or of European ancestry. If you are one of the reader/actors, come on up!
Arrange the reader/actors. Make sure they know the order in which they will read. Tell them that one facilitator will play the role of director, assuring that each voice is respected by pausing the reading for seven to ten seconds between voices and starting the next actor/reader with a nonverbal cue. The other facilitator will act as the first reader, modeling dramatic reading. Invite reader/actors to read the name and ethnic or racial identity of the person before reading each narrative.
Depending on your group size, you may have actors and an audience, or you may have most, or all, workshop participants taking part in the dramatic production. Invite participants, whether or not they are part of the production, to listen to the voices being given life by actors and to note their responses to each person's story.
Open the theater with music you have selected. Enact your Theater of Voices. After the last statement/voice, close your theater with music you have selected or with another suitable closing, such as a time of silence.
If you choose not to do the Theater of Voices, co-facilitators can alternate reading the short narratives. Again, choose and order the voices to maximize their impact and pause seven to ten seconds after each reading.
Post the questions you have written on newsprint and read them aloud. Invite participants to turn to a partner and respond to the questions, telling them they have about 12 minutes for sharing. Let them know when six minutes have passed so both individuals have time to speak.
After 12 minutes, re-gather the group. Lead a discussion with these questions:
Including All Participants
Have large-print copies of the narratives on hand to offer anyone who is visually impaired.
CLOSING (8 MINUTES)
Materials for Activity
Preparation for Activity
Description of Activity
Distribute Taking It Home. Invite participants to follow up on this workshop by observing situations where people are affirmed and situations where people are marginalized because of perceptions based on their race and/or ethnicity. Invite a few volunteers to describe situations of affirmation or marginalization they have already experienced or observed in daily life. Decide how your group will share your observations with one another (social media, a blog, an in-person discussion, and email conversation are possibilities). Decide together on a communication medium to which all participants have access. If this is a stand-alone workshop rather than one in a series, particularly encourage group members to communicate with one another afterward about their observations and experiences.
Offer Reading 701 in Singing the Living Tradition as a closing and extinguish the chalice.
Including All Participants
Prepare a large-print version of Taking It Home.
LEADER REFLECTION AND PLANNING
Take a few moments right after the workshop to ask each other:
TAKING IT HOME
What is true is that for Unitarian Universalism to move into a vibrant future, we will need to mine our past for stories of resistance to oppression, stories of openness to new ways of being religious, stories of transformation that have built new understandings into our narrative of who we are. — Rev. William G. Sinkford, past president of the Unitarian Universalist Association
An important part of multicultural competency is being an astute observer of cultural messages about who belongs and who doesn't. Practice noticing situations where people matter, and where they are marginalized, due to perceptions based on race or ethnicity. If you are the person being marginalized in a particular situation, how do you choose to respond? If you observe another person being marginalized, how do you choose to respond? You might blog, take pictures, or create a video journal to share your observations with others in the group.
BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT: WORKSHOP 1:
HANDOUT 1: GUIDELINES THAT PROMOTE MULTICULTURAL DIALOGUE
Use these suggestions to slow down the flurry of assumptions that can come into play when we talk together about the stories and truths that shape our lives. Following these guidelines can help every participant fully engage with others and grow from our interactions.
BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT: WORKSHOP 1:
LEADER RESOURCE 1: SAMPLE PROGRAM PUBLICITY
For your newsletter or website
Building the World We Dream About for Young Adults is a Unitarian Universalist program that seeks to interrupt the workings of racism and transform how people from different racial/ethnic groups understand and relate to one another. Specifically tailored to take into account the life experiences and situations of young adults, it offers
The program, facilitated by [names] will be offered by [sponsoring organization] [day, date, time, and place]. For more information or to sign up, please contact [registrar, contact information].
For Facebook page, Sunday e-bulletin, or other online post
[Sponsoring organization] is offering Building the World We Dream About for Young Adults, a UU program that guides honest and open conversations about race and practical tools for navigating a multicultural world.
Facilitated by [names]
Offered [date, day, time, and place]
Link to more information and registration
For Twitter
#UU program features honest conversations about race, tools for multicultural world. (Insert link to publicity/registration)
BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT: WORKSHOP 1:
LEADER RESOURCE 2: SAMPLE WELCOME LETTER FOR PARTICIPANTS
Dear
Thank you for registering for Building the World We Dream About for Young Adults. The (program/conference/first workshop) will take place (day, date, time, and place).
This program (these workshops) seeks to interrupt the workings of racism and transform how people from different racial/ethnic groups understand and relate to one another. It features:
There will be time for personal reflection, small group conversation, art and drama activities, and worship. We ask that you bring:
We very much look forward to your participation in this program. If you have questions about the site, please contact (registrar). If you have questions about the program, please contact one of us.
In faith,
[Facilitator names and contact information]
BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT: WORKSHOP 1:
LEADER RESOURCE 3: POEM — TELLING
"Telling" is used with permission. For more information about Laura's poetry and other writing, go to her website, www.laurahershey.com.
What you risk telling your story:
You will bore them.
Your voice will break, your ink will
spill and stain your coat.
No one will understand, their eyes
become fences.
You will park yourself forever
on the outside, your differentness once
and for all revealed, dangerous,
the names you give to yourself
will become epithets.
Your happiness will be called
bravery, denial.
Your sadness will justify their pity.
Your fear will magnify their fears.
Everything you say will prove something about
their god, or their economic system.
Your feelings, that change day
to day, kaleidoscopic,
will freeze in place,
brand you forever,
justify anything they decide to do
with you.
Those with power can afford
to tell their story
or not.
Those without power
risk everything to tell their story
and must.
Someone, somewhere
will hear your story and decide to fight,
to live and refuse compromise.
Someone else will tell
her own story,
risking everything.
BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT: WORKSHOP 1:
LEADER RESOURCE 4: PROGRAM GOALS
This program will:
BUILDING THE WORLD WE DREAM ABOUT: WORKSHOP 1:
LEADER RESOURCE 5: AFFIRMING EXPERIENCES AND MARGINALIZING EXPERIENCES
This resource includes several first-person narratives from Unitarian Universalists, many of them young adults, describing experiences of being affirmed and experiences of being marginalized. Introduce these voices and experiences using a Theater of Voices technique as described Activity 4. Select four or five statements from the "Affirming Experiences" section and a similar number from the "Marginalizing Experiences" section. Pick and choose voices that speak best to your context. Choose about the same number of statements from People of Color and other people marginalized by race or ethnicity as you do from people who identify as White or of European ancestry. After you have selected your material, consider the order of the voices and how to arrange participants visually "on stage" for the most impact. Let your imagination lead you. For example, you might intersperse or alternate affirming experiences and marginalizing experiences, or you might put two readers side by side and invite them to read two different narratives from a single person. As you prepare your production, note that each narrative will take two to three minutes to present.
AFFIRMING EXPERIENCES
Frances, African American
To be African American in this country is to face racism throughout life, however subtle. The love of one's family is paramount in reducing the damage of racism on one's wholeness. Unitarian Universalism is splendid as an affirming church family. Its primary commitment to justice seeking, its deep belief that every soul has irreducible value, and its belief that there is the spark of the divine in every one of us are powerful antidotes to the insistent racist voices among us. I find Unitarian Universalism not only soothing, but healing. It is a perfect medicine for the soul made sick by racism.
Ellen, age 22, White
I questioned my gender identity a lot while I was in college. Long hair, short hair, skirts, cargo pants, binding, not binding... and for a while, I even changed my name. It was during this experimental social transition that I realized how supportive my professors were. After I e-mailed them letting them know about my impending name change, I received messages not only acknowledging it, but letting me know that they were proud of me for making that decision, asking clarifying questions about how I wanted to be addressed or referred to, and letting me know that they had my back if I ran into problems because of my gender identity. But I didn't realize the whole extent of their support until I went back to going by my birth name. My changing identities didn't mean that they were going to take me less seriously, respect me less, or be less of an advocate for me when I needed it. At that point in my life, it turned out that what was most important to me wasn't necessarily that they were supportive of my choice in gender presentation, but that they cared about and respected me regardless.
Daniel, age 30, Haitian American
I felt most affirmed in my identity as an African American of Haitian ancestry when I was able to share a Haitian song with my UU congregation during a service I led. The Director of Music took the time to learn the song Fey-O and set the words to music so that the congregation could sing along. The song was admittedly a challenge for many people in the church due to the language and the pace of the music, but I really appreciated the effort, and I had a good laugh afterwards with the Music Director. Many people in the congregation appreciated having the opportunity to learn something about my childhood and being able to share in it through music.
Supriya, Asian elder
Perhaps one of the most positive and affirming experiences within Unitarian Universalism for me was when I offered to my minister to co-lead with another lay leader a "People of Colour" worship service. Another friend of South Asian ethnicity and I had just returned from a Young Adults of Colour Leadership Development Conference. After meeting young adults from across North America, we returned to Canada inspired and full of energy and courage to have our voices heard. We led a beautiful service that included music from our South Asian heritage, special readings, and meditations. We also introduced Indian classical dance into our worship service. Our title was about the Unitarian Universalist covenant to "promote the inherent worth and dignity of every person". We spoke about how we felt when congregants spoke as if we were sisters (we were not related in any way) or asked where we really came from when giving the city of our birth was an unsatisfactory answer. We spoke of wanting to be accepted as individuals for what we were, not based on the colour of our skin. We spoke of how we felt when the colour of our skin stood in the way of accepting us as individuals. Reaction was positive, and many congregants thanked us for sharing our views. We closed with the song "Woyaya"—"... We are going / Heaven knows how we will get there / But we know we will... " That day we felt affirmed as "People of Colour"—our voices were heard.
Chanda, White
Living in a city where your job defines your identity, you quickly learn that the first question you get asked in almost any gathering is, "What do you do?" Yet, in my congregation, not a person asked me the "Job Question." Instead, they asked things like, "Could you help us out on this project?" and "Would you like to join us for lunch?" Just like that...free acceptance. I was stunned. These people didn't care about my credentials, about my background, about my appearance. If I said I was good at something, they invited me to help out there. When I volunteered to start a new member orientation program, people just assumed I'd do well. When, as a board member, I declined to make follow-up pledge calls, nobody gave me a hard time. Other than from my mother, I've never had such unquestioning acceptance. It feels wildly luxurious to not have to present any persona other than who I really am. And yet, this is not a place where "whatever" rules. We have many expectations of each other: shared values, civility with each other, showing the courage of our convictions, giving generously of time and money, taking action for social justice. In my congregation, we seem to care about what you do in community, not what you do in your day job.
India, age 25, Black
Most recently I had the opportunity to meet one of my favorite authors. I find that I relate to much of what she's written in her poetry and essays on identity, growing up as a multiracial lesbian of Menominee descent. She was in New York to speak as the key note speaker at the fifteen year anniversary of the Audre Lorde Project. She'd known Audre Lorde as a close comrade in the struggle for civil rights for people of color and lgbt people. I went with a friend to pick her up from her hotel. As we rode to the venue she spoke with about her experiences in the movement as well as her everyday life. She listened as we shared and gave us advice on the challenges we were currently facing. I felt affirmed as a young gay woman of color to have an elder reflect that being who we were wasn't about being an different or strange but just as beautiful and commonplace as the sun rising.
Beth, age 27, White
For many people, families are the most difficult people in life to come out to. So when my partner and I decided to get married and mailed out invitations to our entire family, we were taking a risk. We were taking a risk not because any of the family would be finding out about our relationship for the first time, but because we were asking for them to reply as to whether they would attend. We figured that some of our family that we haven't kept in close touch with would decline, but we still made a point of extending the invitation to all. While many members of my partner's family never returned the RSVP card, the one cousin who did wrote in big letters at the bottom, "We will not be in attendance due to our belief that marriage is only recognized as a union between one man and one woman forever as defined by God." Although this cousin's belief was not news to us, the fact that she returned the card with this written on it was very hurtful.
We hesitated to share what happened with the rest of the family, but when we "leaked" the information to my partner's brother the news spread fast. Family members expressed shock and disappointment with the cousin, reiterating over and over again that "this is not how we treat family." (Of course, I thought, "this is not how we should treat anyone!") When news reached my partner's parents and other extended family, they made sure we knew that they supported us, they supported our relationship, and they loved us. My decision to marry a woman brought out some of the most marginalizing and hurtful responses I've ever felt because of who I am, but I am grateful that it also brought out some of the most loving expressions from family and friends.
Brian, age 24, Puerto Rican
I think that a day that I felt uplifted by one of my identities was on my wedding day. I felt such nervousness and worry. I wanted everything to look perfect and go right. But, when I stood there and I saw the faces of those assembled there. The family and friends stood there in support of me. I know that not many lgbt people get that kind of support and love. I know that sometimes people have to marry with no family around them. They knew, though, that I loved myself and unconditionally accepted who I was born to be. In that moment, which now seems so very fleeting, the room was filled with immense love.
MARGINALIZING EXPERIENCES
Supriya, Asian elder
What I find challenging within Unitarian Universalism is that, although we claim that our living tradition draws on many sources, including "wisdom from the world's religions which inspires us in our ethical and spiritual life," this is something that I see very rarely in the many UU congregations I have visited in North America. As a first-generation Canadian, I struggle every Sunday with the fact that worship and the teachings from the pulpit provide me with little connection to the wisdom of my ancestors who were Hindus. Although I find strength in my Unitarian Universalist faith, I miss affirmation that my religious background is as important as the Judeo-Christian tradition. This makes me feel somewhat of an outsider, even within my own religious community. Being the child of immigrants, being an outsider has always been a fact of life and has presented many challenges over time. One place where this challenge should not have to present itself is within a religious community. Although I chose Unitarian Universalism because it held more meaning to me than the religion of my ancestors, I also chose it based on the promise that we would be inspired by the wisdom of the world's religions. I have faith that that day will come.
Daniel, age 23, Multiracial Latino
I felt marginalized growing up in the public school system. Granted, I think any school system would have marginalized me, but public school was rough. I was bilingual, and discouraged from talking in Portuguese. Often I had to be an interpreter when school called because the only adult home was usually my grandmother (both parents worked). I also struggled with expected to be perfect at everything, from both family and the school system. I don't think either of my parents went beyond middle school, and teachers would give me marks on any little thing. People brushed it off as if teachers just do that, but I think myself and other bilingual students were just targeted for that sort of thing. One teacher even said it was to "motivate" me. It only made me miserable, and spiteful. In spite, I did learn how to do everything perfect, but a good chunk of my childhood was spent pleasing others instead of exploring myself.
Bart, age 25, White
I work in a liquor store within a large box store and many times I have people question my intentions, knowledge, or trustworthiness due to my age, class, and appearance. I am a 25 year old white male who works three jobs to pay my bills. A few days ago, I had a gentleman attempt to beckon me over with an "Ahem," a finger point, and a "come here" motion with his finger. When I refused to acknowledge him, he got hostile while I calmly explained that most people ask for assistance, they don't point. That same day, I had another gentleman question whether or not I was going to steal his identity because I called for a manger to approve his personal check. Other times, I've had people say "You don't look old enough to even drink wine, why should I trust you?" not knowing that my other job is for a wine distributor. All of these instances make me feel worthless, like the person I am is only defined by my surroundings, not by my aspirations, goals, or passions.
Alicia, African American
I came back to my congregation after I graduated from college. The racial and ethnic makeup of the congregation mirrored that of the now-gentrified neighborhood surrounding the church. I was not expecting to feel uncomfortable, but I did, instantly. I think it was the looks I received from the new White congregants. They were "What are you doing here?" kind of looks. I wasn't sure if it was my hair, clothes, shoes, or what. But I understood those looks to mean I didn't belong. I'm a Black woman in my twenties who attends a church where I'm free to dress as I want. I've always loved that about my congregation! But Black urban styles of dress, I guess, made me look like a video girl to them—or at least that's what their eyes said. I felt like they probably thought I was uneducated and ill-mannered.
KCS, age 23, White-Jewish
When I was a senior in high school, I had a crush on a sophomore girl. I felt clueless as to how to approach a same-sex relationship. All of my relationships to that point had been with men. We flirted a lot—nothing beyond that. But, as senior prom came around, I knew exactly who I wanted to ask. She was learning Chinese, so I decided to find out how to ask her to prom in Chinese. She said yes. I was elated! We went to prom looking gorgeous in browns and golds together. Although our relationship never passed the courtship phase, I was proud to have asked her out in such an original way and to have been direct for the first time about my feelings for someone of the same sex.
The next year during spring break of my first year in college, I was sitting with some teammates on the beach, drinking beer. One of the girls put everyone to the task of telling a cute story about prom. Even though I knew words couldn't convey the meaning that my prom experience had had for me, I wanted to tell the story. As each of the girls talked about their cute prom experiences with nice boys, I realized that my story wouldn't just be a cute story. I would be coming out as gay, even though I'm not. I realized that, even if they liked me, this would change how the girls related to me. I played out how the conversation would go after that, in my head. I was uncomfortable with the prospect of turning the conversation toward me and my sexuality. I didn't want to be put on the spot about defining my sexuality (which at that point had no label), and I didn't want to become vulnerable to these girls. So I kept my story and my joy to myself.
I still struggle with the issue of coming out. Based on my sexual behaviors, many people would label me as bisexual, even though I am not. I am well aware of bi-phobia and the problematic dynamic that female-bodied people who love people of many genders encounter when others (often straight men) want a demonstration. I feel that I have a certain level of privilege in not needing to come out. But I also feel sad that I don't share more of this part of myself with the people in my world.
Dominique, age 19, Black
I was in a hurry to get on the subway and I slid my card through quickly behind another person. The station manager began yelling and two police officers began to follow me. The officers grabbed me and asked why I didn't pay my fare. I told them that I did and to check my fare card but they refused. The slammed me against the gates and then arrested me for fare evasion. Not only did the officers not listen to me but the station manager also refused to check my fare card. I had to sit in the city jail for 48 hours before I was allowed to be released. Incidents like this happen often to me and to most of my guy friends. When I was younger, my city was filled with black folks. Now that more white people moved in, it feels like the cops are everywhere and always harassing other young black dudes.
Sojourner, African American
While experiencing racism with Unitarian Universalism has been painful, the reaction of UUs when I tell them my story has been even more disturbing to me. Usually most White listeners will want to hear the particulars of what happened to judge for themselves whether they would have named the incident as racism, instead of trusting me. I have to repeat time and time and again the what, where, and how, and relive the pain. It feels like I am being judged as to whether our first Principle should be applied to me. Rarely does this trial occur when I share other stories of oppression around the multiple identities I carry. Thank goodness for listeners of Color and White allies. They hear with their hearts and believe me without the nitty-gritty. When I receive this affirmation it helps me heal and move on. My pain is transformed. I have learned to share my experiences of racism with those in power who have the ability to make a change in the UU institution; and with others who hear me without the need to justify the experience within their own unique world.
Chanda, White
As a child attending segregated schools in Louisiana, I was less aware of race as a dividing line than I was of ethnicity, class, and religion. My father's family spoke Cajun French and broken English. They lived in an unpainted wooden house on the sugarcane plantation where my gran'papa worked. Back in those days, "Cajun" was a derogatory term, and my Georgia-born mother was humiliated that we were related to such poor and uneducated people.
My own family lived on the wrong side of the bayou. We were Baptists in a sea of Catholics. Daddy only had an eighth-grade education, and we learned never to tell that secret to anybody. We struggled to maintain a veneer of gentility in our neighborhood of oyster-shell roads and ditches that overflowed every time it rained. I was a voracious reader, and books told me there was another world out there. I couldn't wait to escape Louisiana; adulthood found me living and working in Washington, DC. Only then did I discover that, despite my perceived differences from the middle class we'd desperately wanted to emulate, I'd had benefits and advantages conferred on me because I was White. I'd lost the south Louisiana accent, gone to college, gotten a high-profile job. I am now able both to understand my privileges in the context of racism and oppression of others and to embrace the gifts of my exuberant "low-class" family.
Daniel, age 30, Haitian American
I can recall a time when I was on a young adult outing with a fairly large group from my congregation at the time. We went to a local diner and in the course of conversation the topic of movies came up. Everyone shared their favorite movies, and a great many people enjoyed the same movies. They were even acting out their favorite scenes from the movies. I had been participating in the conversation up until that point, but I had never seen the films they were discussing. And, the group seemed to really bond with each other in the retelling their favorite movies. These movies were like a distinct
cultural experience that I could not participate in, because my culture was different. I saw different movies growing up. I was completely left out. The conversation stayed on movies, and I felt as though I had become totally invisible. I have never felt more aware of my difference in a UU setting until that moment.
FIND OUT MORE
The UUA Multicultural Growth & Witness staff group offers resources, curricula, trainings, and tools to help Unitarian Universalist congregations and leaders engage in the work of antiracism, antioppression, and multiculturalism. Visit www.uua.org/multicultural (at www.uua.org/multicultural) or email multicultural@uua.org (at mailto:multicultural@uua.org) to learn more.