Helping Our Places of Worship Welcome GLBT Folks
by Donna RenfroDirector of Religious Education
Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Monmouth County
Did you see the great television ad the United Church of Christ (UCC) had on the air for a while? Did you sign the petitions against CBS for banning the ad because of its 'controversial nature'? The part the network found 'controversial' was not turning away the racial minorities, but showing a same sex couple trying to go to church. The point being made was that Jesus did not exclude anyone in his ministry; everyone was welcome. Sometimes we forget that even Jesus had to stop and learn more, to get past the misinformation and prejudice of his culture, to truly welcome everyone. Some of us believe that truth and the word of God are still being revealed, that God doesn't reveal God's whole truth to any one person at any one time in history.
The UCC has a long history of welcoming Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender (GLBT) persons. The Unitarian Universalists also have a long and proud history of welcoming gay and lesbian persons. In 1970 we passed the first of many denominational resolutions to end discrimination against lesbians and gays, and to develop sexual education programs to promote healthy attitudes toward all forms of sexuality and sexual orientation. That first resolution led to our first very forward thinking teen sexuality education program, which has recently been rewritten in conjunction with United Church of Christ (UCC) and is used by both our denominations and Planned Parenthood.
Unitarian Universalism, as a denomination, has been on record as supporting the rights of bisexual, gay, and lesbian people since 1970. The Office of Gay Affairs was formed in 1973. We have advocated against sodomy laws and job and housing discrimination. We have advocated for ceremonies of union and same-gender marriage, the rights of GLBT persons to serve in the military, to lead congregations as ministers and religious professionals, and to be parents. We are now on record as supporting the rights of transgender people. We developed the Welcoming Congregation Programs to combat homophobia in our congregations and to educate individual Unitarian Universalists (UUs). The number of Welcoming Congregations is growing, having nearly doubled in the last eighteen months.
Unitarian Universalists are not alone in the quest to welcome GLBT into our congregations. Several denominations have programs, similar to ours, which a majority of a congregation decides to embark on, to educate itself about how to truly be welcoming to GLBT folks. It involves classes, learning new language, looking at how subtle and pervasive heterosexism and homophobia are. At the end of the process, the church or congregation earns the right to be called a Welcoming Congregation. Or Open and Affirming, if you're UCC; Reconciling, if you're Lutheran or Methodist; Welcoming or More Light, if you're Presbyterian. These denominations are part of a movement to change, to welcome, include, and celebrate GLBT persons in our places of worship. Look for these slogans; you will have found a place that institutionally welcomes you, a place where you can reconcile your spirituality and sexuality in an uplifting way.
As places of worship, we must truly promote the inherent worth and dignity of every person. Regardless of our sexual orientation, we are all part of the full spectrum of God's human creation, a rainbow of diversity. Sexuality is a gift, not a choice we consciously make. Rather, a choice is the decision of how we express who we are, personally and spiritually. We all have spiritual needs. If you are a sexual minority, you want to go to a place of worship without having to hide who you really are. You may feel you have to hide your religious values in the gay community. That may be because there are gay and lesbian people at this very moment who struggle to believe that their sexual orientation is good, who have been damaged by their religion, because their faith has interpreted their scriptures in such a way that GLBT persons are viewed as disordered. This spiritual violence and theological bigotry will end when all faiths begin to honor love between two people of the same gender. Religious traditions will learn that they have been wrong in marginalizing and oppressing GLBT persons.
How can we speed this process along? We can tell our stories and share our pain, and the best place to do this is inside our places of worship, at the coffee hours and forums. Many of us are in respected positions. We ARE ministers, rabbis, priests and deacons, choir leaders and organists, Sunday school teachers. We aren't on the outside knocking to get in. We are holding the church doors open to other gays and lesbians. And we are broadening and stretching the heterosexual community into seeing what GLBT people are like in everyday life—so the mystery goes away and there is less fear. We do this through education, in our classes for children, youth, and adults. We can make sure there are books and educational materials showing the varieties of families. And if you don't see them, donate a copy of "Heather Has Two Mommies," or any of the wonderful newer books for children, teens and adults. In our congregational life, we can make sure we have inclusive affirming language in our by-laws and all our documents, that we have non-discrimination practices in hiring and choosing leaders. In community outreach, we can participate in gay pride events, come to town hall meetings, advertise in media that reaches GLBT persons, encourage our teens to start gay-straight alliances in their schools, get our clergy to speak out.
Let us reclaim the values debate from fundamentalists, showing how people of faith have made ethical decisions throughout our histories, leading the way, marching with Dr. King, testifying before legislatures, etc. Let our faith lead us into a joyous dance of transformation, integrating sexuality and spirituality, justice and mercy. Let us dedicate ourselves to radical reconciliation, co-creating a world without outcasts, calling all to serve as guests and hosts at the welcome table of blessing and power.
Article written for and p rinted in New Jersey Gaze Magazine, June 2005, for Asbury Park Gay Pride Celebration
For more information contact youth @ uua.org.
Last updated on Friday, April 18, 2008.
