For White Folks Who Hate Identity Groups
By Megan Selby with help from Nancy Digiovanni and Annie AbernethyPart I: The Apology
I'm writing this piece to some of my fellow White People who may have attended Identity (ID) Groups and gone away feeling angry, accused, or hurt. I'm writing to those of you who have heard that White Identity Groups are where White People get together so the facilitators can tell them they're racist and bad; I'm even writing to those of you who have attended in the years past and kept coming back. To all of you, I want to say I'm sorry.
I'm sorry because I've been a facilitator of several White identity groups, which I now believe were led very poorly. There was a lot of shaming, invalidating your experiences, broad generalizations, and unnecessary schooling involved. I'm sorry I called you out in anger or tried to shove definitions down your throat. I'm sorry I tried to tell you what your experience as a White Person was supposed to be. I'm sorry I dismissed your concerns and your pain. I did this because of my own feelings of guilt as a White Person and my own struggle with my identity and life experiences that I didn't know how to handle then. I didn't know how to deal with it all, so I took it out on other White People. I used that age-old bully tactic of pushing other people down to lift myself up, and I'm really sorry you had to experience that.
You see, Identity Groups are a fairly new thing for Young Religious Unitarian Universalists (YRUUs). We've only been doing this for five years now, and compared to the history of an organization that's a pretty short time to enact institutional change. When I started facilitating White ID Groups in 2001 I didn't have anyone mentoring me. There wasn't anyone by my side helping me to get past my White guilt. I really didn't know what I was doing half the time, but I thought it was better to be doing something about racism in my YRUU community than nothing. But for some of you I'm not sure that's true. People have been hurt by past White ID Groups, and I've heard youth and young adults tell their friends not to go for that reason. I'm really sorry that was your experience.
Part II: The Invitation
With that said, I would like to invite you all back to White Identity Caucusing. As short of a time as five years is, some significant changes have been/are being made. Those of us who have been working with White Folks folks on Anti-Racism (AR) have learned quite a bit from our mistakes and our successes. We are beginning to listen to all of your concerns, and are starting to listen better to People of Color who are concerned about our activities and strategies in ID Groups. There is collaboration with other organizations doing Anti-racism and Identity work, and as we have been witnessing their style they have been giving us some important critiques of our work. We have Anti-Racist elders in our faith who are working with us now giving us their support and guidance. We're doing things differently now. We're becoming a community of White Folks that support each other's struggles, validate one another's experiences, and appreciate the cultural diversity that exists in White communities.
Don't get me wrong. Some of the old problems are still present. We haven't yet created the ideal community of White Folks who are supportive of each other, accountable to People of Color, and doing Anti-racism work; however, we're working on it and we need your help to keep us evolving and making our space safe. We need to reach all those people who have attended those shame-based White ID Groups of the past, say "we're sorry," and show them another way of doing AR work so "the shame" isn't perpetuated. We need to be continuously critical of what we're doing in our activities, strategies, words, and principles. We still need to break down issues of elitism in the White Allies community and be more inclusive and appreciative of new folks. We need to value different ways of approaching Anti-racism, so if someone doesn't follow the YRUU precedent we can still appreciate and incorporate those sentiments and view them as steps in building an Anti-Racist community. Most importantly, we White People need to keep working on Anti-racism and the struggle to understand our identity as people who are privileged by the oppressive system of racism. It is our responsibility.
There are a couple groups of people who have taken on this responsibility, including the newly forming White Allies organization and the White Folks in the Anti-racism Trainer-Organizer (ARTO) Collective. Acting as hubs for feedback from various conferences and workshops, these groups are getting other White Folks involved in Anti-racism and Identity work. They are constantly reworking programs like White Identity Groups to include this feedback. For more information on the White Allies organization or the ARTO program, contact the Youth Office. Get in contact with these groups and help them do the work. They need you.
Give White ID Groups another chance. See if you find truth in anything written here. See if there are changes being made. If you still don't like them, I won't blame you. I'll do my best to listen to your concerns and explore what other transformations can be made. We can work together to build our community. We need to work together.
Megan Selby is a member of the Anti-Racism Trainer Organizer Collective, a former YRUU Programs Specialist, and a student in Bloomington, IN.
For more information contact youth @ uua.org.
Last updated on Friday, April 18, 2008.
